I'm drowning maybe you haven't noticed I hide it well it ain't external but I have no breath left inside of self I'm breaking mirrors cuz they only confirm my lies to self never believed in luck so I have no coins inside a well whoa, don't wish me well--rather you pray for me I envision a circle of vultures preying on me they see me dying, I haven't felt alive I been numb for a decade, I haven't felt my cries I talk to my son, he helps me feel something I hope he's oblivious of the problems wit me and his mother but I don't fault her tho I won't falter cuz I'm a father although I'm farther yes I have fallen but I've found favor and I keep faith that hold up... I'm drowning maybe you haven't noticed I hide it well I can promise a lot but I get outside of self I'm always quicker to doubt when I rely on self I get ahead of self but wit a head of steam my ego becomes my medicine I dream and believe I see success ahead of me mistakes wont paint my legacy they didn't build me, they didn't leggo me I'm moving future, my past just had a leg on me but please let go, I'm hold up..I'm drowning maybe you haven't noticed I hide it well I dream a lot but dreams start from inside of self so I fight with those visions and voices deep inside my head and I just can't get out my head sometimes I can't get out the bed I feel like my heels are hanging off a ledge I feel these pills wearing off I'm dead paradox, I feel more alive drousy--i feel something at least drenched with cold sweats chills and shivers up under these sheets I get a burst off energy then go under for weeks u rather me a clown, u hate seeing me frown, I try to turn this frown up, I hate feeling down, tho I gravitate to downers its a spell I've tried to counter but my whole life I've been down up doing up downs upside down starting from the grown up every season my seasoning has been raw pride I've had to ground up because the chunks are too much and I'm such a such and such and a clutz that after I slip I've noticed I slipped up cuz I've been drowning maybe you haven't noticed I hide it well but that's enough telling, I feel I've said too much, now I'm outside myself I got to go for now, and get some time for self the only thing I wonder is now that you know will you bother to notice something more than yourself and lend some help
RUSSELL
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