When I came in, it was the first time you were there before I arrived, seeing you rise while caught me in surprise, not knowing you were coming, how you ran to my arms...stuff dreams are made of. what better surprise is there besides early parole, than your son being brought to see you, reaffirming your bond and love? The way I was able to hold you in my arms, cuddle, hug, and kiss you. Being able to play a little rough with you, dance, and play games. While in my arms, you overly scrutinized every inch of my face and hands with your eyes and hands, probing me as if to savor the memory of me, knowing that this was borrowed time, not wanting to forget the look of your father. I saw you searching for yourself in me, as a way of validation and pride in your difference given that most people around you look and act less like you, though we are so far away from each other, we are so similar. All i could think of son, is how much I missed you, and how much you loved me still despite my bad. It left an impression on me because I become more and more surprised at how analytical you are at only 6, so i know you loving me is a real decision made, being every bit strong willed, its not by default. Damn, you are turning 7 soon, it's almost like you knew you are getting bigger and you wanted to savor being in my arms and lap before you become to big, catching up on these lost years all in one visit. All that energy you have, people don't understand it, but it makes us unique, we both are curious and adventurous when it comes to experiencing everything. It's how we learn and share the best part of our creative selves. I get you son, you are a ball of energy, the life of the room. I don't even remember how many times you kissed me, ha, I know that will stop soon though-a man code set for us both;)
RUSSELL
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