Why is believing in self so hard?

Why is believing in self so hard? people seem scared of the responsibility of choice I mean that kind of choice where there are consequences that can't be blamed on anyone but yourself people seem safer in their blame bubbles believing in themselves so flawed that the suppression of self can be their ONLY hope at salvation since when did suppression mean freedom when did suppression mean a fuller life when did suppression become a means for judgement when did suppression become a place of separation suppression is another prison we've created within our lives how scary is it to know in yourself More to know in yourself that source and light of God's perfection and love but still unable to deal with your own self battling fear, pain, self consciousness, ego, forgiveness, animosity, desires, urges, delusions, confusion, guilt how many titles and labels have done nothing but serve as more sanctions and prisons no wonder we're so in love with sending masses off to prison it's like a deflection from self judgement of personal guilt instead of peering into a mirror, you turn from it then build prisons feeling more safe offering judgement than love scared of self reflection irony- reflection has become prison